Donald Trump Called Me a Loser

Add my name to the burgeoning list of people that Donald Trump has categorized as a loser. Where's Rosie O'Donnell's shoulder when you need it? Trump's comment "Show me someone with no ego and I will show you a big loser" seems like a direct attack. After all, I have been raised to be humble, soft-spoken and overly conscious of other's feelings. Spiritual writer, Louise Hay, reminded me, too, that I would rather be happy than right. All my life, or so it seems, I have yielded to the wants and demands of my super-ego counterparts.

Sheepishly I have to admit that I thought the Higher Power would reward my unpretentious, almost apologetic manner. Mahatma Gandhi and his ilk would smile upon my meek and modest ways, and advocate for the blessings of the universe to fall in my direction. I would be rewarded for my conscious decision to refrain from the following ego-driven actions: Controlling, if not devaluing others, living with an air of superiority because of job or accomplishments, speaking or treating others in an arrogant or haughty manner, especially to those who are deemed unsuccessful, or boasting about The Car, The House, the Stock Dividends or anything that elevates one's status in others' eyes.

It is not difficult for me to recognize individuals who possess an over abundance of ego. From the time that I was a little boy, for example, my uncle seemed very fond of his own voice. A much better speaker than listener, he offered opinions about any subject, definitive this his views and judgments were always right. He consistently acted in a condescending and patronizing manner, seemingly bolstered by the success and concomitant wealth he attained in business. His humor was not good-natured but rather caustic and acerbic, offered to take others down a peg. After all, he HAD to assume the highest position in any pecking order – the equivalent of renting (no buying) the Penthouse because it is considered the best.

It seemed counterintuitive to me that my uncle achieved such success in the workplace. Didn't his personality grate others? Could I be the only one perceptive enough to notice all his shortcomings stemming from an ego gone wild? As I consider the matter from my perspective now, maybe his ego served him well in Corporate America.

Perhaps his ego galvanized his sense of purpose. Desperate to be a "winner" – one that even Donald Trump would be impressed by – meant that he would make the necessary sacrifices to attain business success. My uncle did work long hours, took work home and assumed great responsibility.

But many of us (myself included) make a myriad of similar sacrifices and are still not on the "fast track," climbing up the proverbial corporate ladder. But my uncle expected success and many of us only hope that our efforts will be rewarded. His "Trumpesque ego" led him to the belief that no one could do his job better and that his employer was fortunate to have him in their employ. He approached his job with unabashed confidence and it is likely that his employer felt a large of measure of reassurance stemming from it.

Executives running a basketball team enjoy the brashness and confidence of a superstar, exclaiming that he wants to take the last shot in a ball game. Similarly, CEOs and CFOs hire and keep employees who are convinced that they can run with a project – faster and farther than anyone else. Of course, confidence without competence is meaningless.

Another consideration regarding my uncle's success: Perhaps he did check his ego at the front of his employer's door, containing his swagger and pompous demeanor. (He certainly compensated for this restraint at home.) In his book, How to Get Rich, Trump writes: "The ego works to keep our conscious and unconscious aspects in balance. Too much either way can be detrimental. No ego means very little life force, and too much means a dictatorial personality." At work, perhaps my uncle controlled his ego rather than letting his ego control him. I'm sure his co-workers and underlings saw and witnessed my uncle's unrestrained ego at times but I'm sure the frequency was a lot less than what I observed.

Where my uncle has an overabundance of ego, perhaps I need to infuse and build my own. I want to believe and conceive my success through feelings of empowerment and a healthy ego – not one that is unbridled. Mr. Trump, due to your influence, I declare the following affirmation: "I will not be a loser much longer. My ego is in the gestation process." How can it not be so? I'm reading your book!